October 16 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Alyce
Okay, let me just start off by saying that if your day begins with a query from your number four fan asking where to buy leopard-print heels for his new girlfriend who has another boyfriend but really needs some leopard print heels, you should just have some coffee and start over.
Especially when his response to your suggestion is “that looks like something that could come out of Arnie’s butt.”
Like I’d KNOW. Stop that. Mr C., if you do not know where to find leopard print pumps by the age of 35, you are not going to find out without paying a taxi driver in Bangkok. And what the heck makes you think that I know where these things are kept? Try Priscilla’s, back shelf by the lady named Matilda who wipes her lipstick on the size five panties when she thinks nobody’s looking. Tell her I said hi. I mean, I have no idea. How dare you? Read the rest of this entry »
September 11 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Elie Saab
Let me start over. It’s been a week, dude, seriously. Arnie is burying his father today in a town four hours away from me, but I’m not going. Not because I don’t want to, but because Philip doesn’t think I need to be driving that far alone given my health.
Well, pfui on you, my darling, and pfui on Arnie for agreeing with you. Hmph, thpt, and .. he’s right, you know. I really am getting better all the time, but my long term stamina is just not there yet. By two in the afternoon, I’d be hopping in the grave with Daymon to get some rest. Daymon wouldn’t mind, but Arnie might be nonplussed to say the least. Read the rest of this entry »
August 11 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Jim Hjelm Blush
Ah, the maelstrom swirls around me. Good stuff, bad stuff, sad stuff, all of it windblowin like the leaves swirling off my oak tree before they hit the driveway, or fall into the yard. If they’re lucky, they land on the park bench and become part of an art project. If they’re not, they get pooped on by the dog. Such is life.
Arnie’s father, Daymon, is dying. Or already gone – I haven’t talked to Arn in seven or eight hours, so I’m not up to date at the moment. At any rate, the large, vibrant man I met four years ago is now a shell, tethered to life by a ventilator tube, septic and sick and tired and ready to go home and see the wife he loves and lost the week before I met him. He called me “Missouri”. Or “Nurse Julie”. If I called him up and told him to check his blood sugar, he’d do it, but only because he thought I was cute. I’m gonna miss the old guy, but I know he’s been wanting out of here for a long time now. It’s time to go home, see Martha, put the feet up, have a rest. No pain, no more. Peaceful journey, Mr. Simon. You were much loved and will be missed. Read the rest of this entry »
July 5 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Katrina Marie Designs
Ummm.. other stuff. Yeah.
Looks like the family is safe, if not necessarily comfortable. My niece Gwen, who is six, should be arriving in Ozarkia from Biloxi soon. Ft. Polk, where my brother Sparky is stationed, has sent 4,000 troops to New Orleans, so we probably won’t be hearing from him for awhile. Bridgette, if you’re reading, tell him Vicks helps with the smell, if you put it under your nostrils. Sorry, folks, but reality is not pretty.
We got the K-lites moved into their new house over the weekend. It’s cute and not as dusty/moldy as the other one, so hopefully Mrs. K. won’t “die of respitory”. Bless her heart. Read the rest of this entry »
June 13 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Party Time Formals
Yesterday, I got to see my mother. She just called the other night and said she was going to Branson to check on her antiques and did I want to go, and of course I did. We had a nice time, just the two of us. We hit both galleries and fixed her booths. Daddy is selling some of his photography, as well, so we hung some of his work, played with Fostoria glass and Dresden pieces and antique nickel silver and rearranged the merchandise. It didn’t take long to fix, which left time for lunch.
Snow crab legs. Yummmm.
I got a new Kate Spade bag, so I was happy. I also got a nifty sari scarf in the most beautiful shade of blue, along with some Indian bangle bracelets, from my father, because he rocks. Your Monarch is easily pleased with trinkets, shiny things, and stuff that hold trinkets and shiny things. Oh, and yummy-smelling things. Which reminds me I am nearly out of Chanel No. 5, which brings me to…. Read the rest of this entry »
May 23 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Sherry
My sister Princessbelle had her tonsils out today. Surgery went well, and she was awake and playing on the computer when Mom called me to update. I’d only called about five times to make sure she was okay. I mean, kids can bleed to death from tonsillectomies, did you know that? I did, therefore, I worry. I didn’t wanna have to go down there and beat up some perfectly nice doctor for letting my sister bleed to death. But aside from the Baby Belle not having adenoids, everything was perfect. Daddy was out getting the good drugs, Mom was keeping me from having a long-distance fit, and Princessbelle was home and feeling no pain within two hours of surgery, so yay! All is well. Whew. That’s one lucky doctor, is all I’m sayin’.
Your Monarch, however, is hmphy. Hmphy, annoyed-ish, and generally out of sorts, not to mention somewhat out of breath. Read the rest of this entry »
April 16 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Sherri Hill
New doctor this morning. I really hope this one knows what the heck he’s doing, because this nitroglycerin thing makes me feel like a bomb. Think about it – nitro and fertilizer makes a lovely explosive, and we all know i’m full of, er, fertilizer. Yikes. On the other hand, it totally helps. So.. i dunno, but i’m pretty sure this stuff is not in my head, or my head would explode. Yes, Kevin, I am walking, a bit at a time. heh.
The IBP has a plan for kitten acquisition. His friend Nikki’s barn cats breed a lot, so there is usually a litter over there. The new ones are four days old and our boy is in love with a tiny grey tiger stripe. Philip said no no no no no, so The Boy is plotting http://www.fashion-sneakers.info/. He’s approached his daddy once with a game plan, been very kindly shot down (his plan involved using towels as cat litter), and is reconning for his next move. I passed him off on this one. Read the rest of this entry »
March 19 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Alyce
I have had my entire medical history taken. I have been auscultated and palpated and said “ah”. I have been poked in the ankles, in the veins (lots of those), and in the neck. I have had a twelve-lead EKG, multiple labs, and two nurses working on me at once.
One of them was cute, and she was a sweetheart. The other guy was not so much cute but also nice, and he got my veins to bleed when they rolled up and refused to work for the first girl. I have tape all over me.
Upshot? Um, dunno yet. Vitals weren’t too bad – still a bit on the tachy side, heartwise (that means fast), and my blood pressure, although better, was still a tetch high given the drugs I’m on. So Dr. Welby is gonna check out everything and give me my options on Tuesday. Read the rest of this entry »
March 16 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Alyce
HRH Julie, IQWM, housewife. Holy cats.
This does not mean I’m getting a minivan, i just want that clear. Neither a soccer decal, or My Kid Is An Outer Ozarkia School For Overpriveleged Youth Honor Student bumper sticker. (They are, but so? Who needs to gloat when there are all those stupid redneck kids in the world?)
Due to my heart going thumpety-thump and Philip’s jawclenchiness and the kids’ need for some intensive parenting, we have decided that I’m not going back to work for awhile. Maybe for a long while, or at least until I go broke or stir-crazy.
Actually, I haven’t been terribly stir-crazy of late. I’ve actually been home a couple of weeks already and I really like it. When I feel like taking a walk, i take one. When i feel like a nap, i take one of those. When i feel like a brownie, i remember that we don’t keep sugar in the house any more, and break out the bourbon before noon. (Well, not yet, but i COULD, is the thing.) Read the rest of this entry »
January 25 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Jim Hjelm Blush
Daddy has been doing some blogging re: his recent trip to India and some of the things he saw there. I do notice hardly a reference to the amoebic dysentery he brought home as a gift from the East, but I suppose that’s just as well.
I love many things Indian. My house is an eclectic mix of art from China, England, Brazil, the US, and a nice few Indian pieces – mostly because my art comes from the travels of my parents and grandparents. I never go anywhere, but my house looks like I do.
My kitchen is French-Italian vineyard complete with wine bottles, decanters, and glasses everywhere. My dining room is Franciscan Desert Rose mixed with Victorian because I had to do something with that horrid wallpaper (see birthday pic below) and my Mema’s beautiful Desert Rose china, which she has given me and which I adore beyond words. My bedroom is red and gold Chinese on Victorian four-poster with Brazilian and Indian accents and my great-grandmother’s 1860s rocking chair. Read the rest of this entry »
January 21 , 2012 | Posted by admin | In: Jim Hjelm Blush
On one note, bad news: The NYC trip, at least for Taryn and me, is canceled. This is partly because my health is not such that I can go and partly because College Boy is going to chaperone the trip and need not be chaperoning my minor child who is also his semi-ex-quasi-sort-of-not-really-on-again-off-again-no-I-mean-it-this-time-it’s-totally-off girlfriend (“but we can still be friends right, let’s talk every day, just saying, yeah”), but there is another reason.
My child, the one who walks into lamps, has been nominated to audition for the Missouri Fine Arts Academy summer program in DANCE, of all things.
Each school whose theater departments earn entry gets two or three slots per school to audition, and the state entirely funds the residential program, which is a month long and is held at Missouri State University. MSU supplies the dorms and facilities, and they and other schools supply faculty for acting, voice, instrumental music and dance. This year, Taryn’s school has spots open in music, acting and dance, and they’re sending Taryn to audition for entry into the dance program. Read the rest of this entry »
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